All Posts Tagged: habits
No matter what kind of person you are, confident or not, you have and will experience some gut-wrenching, mouth-drying, fear at some point… You can feel it rise up inside, tying your stomach, throat and tongue together in its wake. It can freeze us, make us run, make us stronger, make us weaker, and do all sorts of funky stuff to our behaviour.
Anxiety is like fear’s side-show, or warm-up act. It gets us into the ‘right’ frame of mind so that rational decisions go out the window and clarity is nowhere to be seen. Now fear has the stage all to itself and it wants to dominate YOUR show. You gonna let it?
What are you actually scared of? Apart from the obvious fears and phobias, let’s look at some everyday life scenarios that can make you scared enough to stop you in your tracks…
- Doing it alone. Everything feels less scary when there is someone there to do it with us, but in life we find ourselves in many situations where we need to find the strength to do it alone. You got this! Trust yourself.
- They won’t like you anymore. Do you think that if you say or do something that feels right to you, then others may not like you anymore? Well you can’t please everyone and when you start speaking YOUR TRUTH, your kind of people will be there and loving it. Don’t be scared to be you.
- You have never done it before. Sure, first time we do anything it is scary but the more times we do it, the more normal it becomes.
- It won’t work. It is scary to think about putting in loads of effort and cost, then not getting any results. Yup, but it’s even more scary to think about having a life where you didn’t do anything in case it didn’t work…Take calculated risks and work your butt off to make it work.
- Looking stupid. We all have this fear! Be honest with others and yourself, do not promise more than you can do and always be willing to listen and learn. This will significantly reduce your chances of looking stupid. There is something undoubtedly attractive about a person who doesn’t think they know it all, doesn’t try to do things they won’t finish and is totally open to learning something from everyone.
If you want different results and new experiences to happen in your life, you have to practice different behaviours and make new habits. This is scary for the above reasons.
Remember, by practicing new habits and behaviours, you are not changing who you are to fit anything or anyone, you are simply expanding your mind, your comfort zone, and your abilities to deal with situations. Many of our behaviours and habits do not benefit us, so we develop more habits to counteract the effects of the first ones.
Like when we have bad eating, drinking, or thinking habits and it has bad effects on our health or weight, so we try a new diet, surgery or products to counteract the effects…Guess what, it doesn’t work because you never addressed the first habit, just the effects of it. Remember from the Size HH book, habits are neural pathways in your brain, the more times they are used, the clearer that path becomes and the easier it is to do it again. That goes for all habits, good and bad.
That also means, if you keep giving up on things when they become scary, it will be easier to do the same in future. Your brain will routinely get to the point you are not comfortable with, then the receptionist of your mind will say ‘whoa there girl this is danger zone, turn round and head back to safety’. You can’t blame her for being protective, but before listening to her and heading back to safety immediately, find the rebel in you and ask yourself this question – What if I couldn’t make a mistake?
What if nothing is a mistake (society just made us think it is), but everything is a lesson and learning curve instead? From that mindset you can leave some of that
fear at the door and think ‘Right, if things don’t go to plan here, at least I will know more about this first hand and will have learnt XYZ’.
Your purpose on this earth is to turn energy into matter. That means if you have a desire, an energy to do something, don’t ignore it! Don’t listen to the negative self-talk that anxiety produces. Turn that energy into matter. Turn it into a physical experience, turn it into a real product, or art, or, book, or invention or the physical gift of affection, forgiveness, whatever! Just do it.
No one gets to do any of these things without bumping into anxiety and fear along the way, no one. So you might aswell learn everything you can about how and why you feel it, and how to move past it quickly.
It’s also worth remembering that everything good usually comes after a feeling of being uncomfortable, especially for women (think child birth). If it feels fine and dandy, perfectly comfortable 100% of the time, you are not expanding and your habits will stay the same.
Of course, you and only you have the power to say when you will and will not tolerate feeling uncomfortable, because every situation is different. Ask any successful person though, they will tell you that good change feels uncomfortable first, pleasurable after, not the other way around.
Now let’s stop giving fear so much attention. If you feel anxious but still have the desire to do it, take the first step anyway, regardless of the outcome. You don’t need to see the whole path as they say, just keep taking it step by step. You will be so proud of yourself for having done something you were initially so scared of.
That my friends is how you kick fear up the proverbial butt, expand your mind and make your dreams into reality. Is it easy? Of course not. Is it worth it? Hell yes!
** I double dare you to do something you desire that makes you feel uncomfortable today! **
Have you overcome a fear and feel proud of yourself now? Tell us in the comments!
Before our official Size HH paperback launch in the UK this spring, we wanted to give our online community the most useful advice about women’s health, weight loss, body image and everything on similar topics. So, we decided to take part in the famous 30 Day Blogging Challenge, hosted by Birds On The Blog’s very own Sarah Arrow, to get loads of our information out to you in just one month! We are all about living good and feeling great, so our passion is to keep you as well informed as possible.
Here is a round up of our best blogs from last week for you to take an info fix, plus a few useful links for some healthy recipes and feel-good sites we have enjoyed in the last week…
The secret has had us all talking about the law of attraction. So, is it really possible to attract your ideal body through the power of thought? We had to investigate…
Size HH: The Most Enviable Size To Be. It’s a bold statement to make right! Find out why it’s true and how you can jump on the Happy & Healthy bandwagon too.
There are lots of myths and inaccurate information out there about metabolism. It is an important subject so we had to share the facts so that you can make the best of your own metabolism and feel better than ever.
If you have wanted to stop using as much cow’s milk but not sure which other milks to try, this article may help you decide which ones could be right for you.
Here you can find out why comfort eating becomes such a strong habit and how to change it with some useful advice from Mindset Trainer, Caroline Ferguson.
No carbs before Marbs? Find out why cutting out all carbs from your diet to lose weight is a bad idea if you actually intend on leaving the house during that time…
Tips to make any meal that little bit better for you and how to get the most nutrients from your meals, from preparation to cooking and serving.
Other useful links
If you want to see more tips from Mindset Trainer, Caroline Fergusons you can do so here.
Anandi Sleep Guru – Our sleep and yoga expert Anandi is a fountain of wellbeing information and well worth following if you want a better night’s sleep in this busy world.
The Glasshouse Girls – There are some very interesting chat topics on this fabulous blog site if you enjoy a thought provoking read! We love a tasty recipe too so had to share this divine Spanish chicken recipe with you from Lady Lolita.
Have any links to great articles on these topics? Feel free to share in the comments!
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Happy New Year Everyone, what an awesome Christmas! I have to confess I had a second helping of turkey and drank far more prosecco than I planned, but it sure was a merry time! To be honest, being away in Thailand this Christmas lead to me over indulging in a little more of everything and I thoroughly enjoyed myself.
At this point I bet you’ll be expecting me to say how I’ve also gained weight and my cloths are tighter, but they’re not! So how does that work? How did I go away on a 3 week holiday, eat all the delicious Thai food I want, indulge in Christmas goodies and come out lighter on the other side? No I wasn’t ill and not once did I have “deli belly”!
Let me share a secret with you….
Well it’s not a secret is it? You already know your weight is made up of more than just fat. The weight of a fully grown adult is a mix of muscle, water and fat… All three we need, though unless you use highly specialised scales or body fat callipers, it’s quite hard to determine if the results on your scales are actually benefitting you which is why I recommend you give your scales this treatment.
Click here to watch Natalie’s 5 second video!
The truth is, I lost muscle mass… I really need the use of a tearful emoji here as I’m not pleased about that! Muscle helps to increase my metabolic rate, meaning I can eat more, look more defined and it makes me stronger. This year I want to pull more than last years 120kg deadlift, so strength and muscle are high priorities!
Anyway, that crash diet you may be thinking about (or embarking on), you know the one that says it will help you speed up your “weight loss”, is very likely to steal your muscle too! Sure it could help with a reduction in excess water and a little fat but it will attack your muscles first… Less muscle = slower metabolism and less requirement for food. This is also the result of yo-yo dieting!
By simply focusing on the foods I need to give me health, strength and energy, rather than thinking about what I shouldn’t eat makes it much easier to get back on track and stay there. I still enjoy treats but I give my body what it needs first and foremost. After that, I find I don’t even crave the treats very much and I feel fuller for longer.
Consistency is key, if you leave a tap running the bath will overflow. Pull the plug and you’ll drain the water away. Small changes that become habits will help to sustain the right balance (my changes didn’t happen over night if you’ve read the book you’ll know the hard lessons I’ve learned).
So if like the masses you’re about to embark on the latest fad diet, detox or cleanse. Think about what your body really needs, fuel it, give it enough water, eat a variety of colours and plenty of greens, eat varied and balanced meals, cut back on alcohol and processed snacks. Instead of starving yourself, aim to become healthier by making your meals and snacks more nutritious. Small changes over time, lead to longer lasting results…
Trust me, if I can do it, you can too!
How often do you check your weight on the scales?
How often does the result leave you feeling less than happy?
As women, our weight fluctuates constantly from water retention and other factors, so it’s almost impossible to see an accurate reading if you weigh yourself too often (ie everyday).
Sometimes we become so fixated on an ideal weight we would like to be, so we keep checking and waiting in judgment of the scales, until we reach that magic number. Once that number is reached, a new struggle begins to maintain that number!
Our weight is made up from many things including water, bones, muscle, organs and body fat. Just because the scales say you have lost 2lb this week ( or put on 2lb) doesn’t necessarily mean it’s body fat. It could be water or muscle…
What about scales that measure body fat, muscle etc?
Scales that measure body composition are a much better choice for measuring health, compared to traditional scales that just measure overall weight. However, it’s worth keeping in mind that even the expensive ones are not 100% accurate and, like most things, best when used in moderation. Some people may even use these types of scales more often than the traditional types because there are more interesting results to find out! Unfortunately this just provides more opportunities to be disheartened by the result. Body composition scales are definitely more helpful than traditional scales for measuring health progress though 100%.
If you like to track your progress, we think a tape measure once per month can be a good way of doing this because it’s tailored to every inch of your unique shape, rather than a computer judging you over-all. It is also less likely you will disappointed by the result because you will become more accepting of the different parts to your figure and be less focused on trying to force your entire body down to a certain weight.
We want you to stay as positive as possible from now on and forget about reaching a certain size or weight. This will allow you to aim for premium health and vitality instead! So, do you have the courage to ditch the scales? Let us know!
Click HERE to see Natalie Guyan, one of our contributors, finally ditching her scales once and for all!
We have received a few questions about the book and what we stand for, so I decided to put all this information in a blog. I realise fat and weight loss can be a controversial subject for some people, so we want our message to be clear.
We promote body confidence and health at every size. Whatever clothing size you are, there is every reason for aiming to be as healthy as possible. Even small changes, or just one healthier change every day, helps us to feel more body confident.
However we also know that it’s not actually possible for everybody to be healthy at every size. To be very under or overweight is usually not a healthy balance for most people. Our bodies all have a natural balance of body fat, different for every woman. If we maintain a weight or body fat level above or below our natural balance, for long periods of time, we will start to notice the effects health wise.
Of course your clothing size doesn’t necessarily govern how healthy or happy you are and it’s not a reflection of who you are as a person either. You are more important than any number on the scales and still you at whatever size or weight, so let’s forget clothing sizes as a goal and focus on health instead. When optimum health is your goal, the right, natural size and weight for your shape will come as a result and you will feel better than ever.
Not everyone puts on weight through eating and not everybody who is thin has become that way through eating, yet everybody is usually judged the same.
‘She looks overweight, she must eat too much’
‘She looks too thin she must be starving herself’
The media doesn’t always help, actually publishing this information about celebrities, making us think that this is what’s important. The only thing that really matters in life is our health, our loved ones and the planet we live on. That’s what is important.
Some people feel better about themselves when they are curvier and some feel better about themselves leaner, it is just the way of the world and we have appreciate everyone is different and respect that. What we do believe in though, is learning to love and appreciate your body for what it is and can do, not just what it looks like. Yes image is something in this world unfortunately, but health and happiness is far more important!
If you genuinely feel body confident, happy and healthy you have cracked it, but if not, the book is there for people that want to feel better, quickly. Weight loss is not our main focus but happens to be a side effect for people whose eating behaviour has lead them to becoming over weight. Habits and eating behaviour can be made healthier if that’s what you want…
More to come about habit changing with tips and challenges on our future blogs!
We would love to hear what you think, comment below or email us at email@example.com